“Welcome home, Blue!”

“Now, before you begin breaking the house, we need to help you become housebroken.”

“Please, bark times two if you wish to head outdoors regarding that number too.”

“And, please, bark times three if you, instead, just need to wee by a tree.”

“Most importantly, though—if you cannot make to the exit in time, place your bum on the bumf in the corner so as to avoid a crime.” ; )