Meow, I am a black cat; this is true. But, no ‘absit omen’ is necessary to prevent unlucky luck to you.
I look not up at you as your minion, ready to follow and obey; I am hypnotising you with golden eyes so that you might do what I purr-say.
Be not a bozo. I need no mozo to fetch me kibble crunchy and milky white. When I hunger or thirst, I tap my mooers and give paw-ables a fresh bite.
I do not care if you feel like a futilitarian in your life; vegetarians are people too. Just be aware that if those arms are descending to take me to tub, it will not happen and you will remain you. ; )