28.February.18


Ahem, are there items in your closed hand that might bring happiness to me if said hand was opened and lowered to within reach of my tongue? If that might be the case, I would appreciate it if you might place the items in a quincunx for, you see, that arrangement allows me to achieve both maximum taste and maximum texture pleasures as items are taken into the flavour factory. Also, I saw a squirrel today and I barked at it, but it would not acquiesce to my request for a massage by its bushy tail. After the millesimal plea, I gave up and left for an acceptable alternative: rolling around on your freshly laundered hand towels. Your roommate had a bit of a breakdown today; I think she broke up with her boyfriend–some guy named Jesus. She was glued to her laptop all afternoon and there were these books laid out all over the couch. I saw this crazy, white, skinny snake crawling up near her, so I attacked it before it could bite her. Luckily, the computer fell on the snake during the struggle and helped me eliminate the threat. That’s when she screamed, “My exegesis!” I do not know about her; I saved her life and all she can think about is this ex. Let us focus on the issue at hand: a pat of gratitude would have been nice. She needs to move on. I felt like playing catch today, but I could not find that plastic disc and your roomie locked herself in the boudoir after the ‘incident’, so I would have had nobody with whom to play anyway. I do not have a degree in ufology, but would those floral discs you keep in the cabinet and off which you eat food only during the snowy months be acceptable for catch until I find the other one? In fact, let us go play now; I see pretty flashes in the sky and the trees are dancing, so those flower discs should get decent lift. Let’s go! ; )

Categories: Melange

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